So I finally did it, I'm done I'm free, no more dreadful days. But now it seems as I am left in uncertainty and anxiousness. Not that those feelings weren't there before, but now I don't have an excuse for the uncertainty.
When you take that leap, do we ever now what is to follow? I guess that is why it is called a leap of faith..right? Well once again I have taken that leap I just hope I don't stay midair for too long.
I have learned that life is definitely full of ups and downs (especially when you feel alone) My current highs are the good email that lets me know that I am wanted in the world, I can also find this high while at the gym and while I am sweating and not letting a care in the world get between me and that treadmill. But then there are the lows. Currently mine are filled with the uncertainty of the future. I mean I never wanted my life to be handed to me on a silver plate, but now that I am "expected" to have plans, know where I am going, there is that constant emptiness of "what if I don't know?" "what if those things don't come?"
and what might even be worse is when those opportunities do come along how are we suppose to know which one is right? How big of leap can I make? How long can I stay in midair and still know that there is a ground underneath me?
too many questions? but really there is no one who can answer them but my own future...
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