It's an awful feeling, isn't it? Like, you had to do just that one thing, just that one little thing, and probably no one even asked you to do it, you just said you would. And then you didn't. You... scumbag! You...loser! You...Seinfeld cast reject!
No soup for you!
That's the tape that goes through my head, anyway.
A couple months I got to thinking about all that. And the idea that came to me was, do you have to be consciously intending to pray to be praying? Like, do you have to stop and literally say someone's name to God, or say something about them to God, for a prayer you promised to happen? Does prayer require your self-awareness?
What if instead, once you agree to pray for someone, you're carrying them in your heart from that point on, whether you're aware of them all the time or not? Like the prayer isn't in the words, it's embodied in you.
Could it be that the act of saying we will pray for someone opens a door inside us, and once it's open, we are the expression of the prayer.
I don't know. Could be a cop-out, I guess. Probably is, for me, in some cases. But something to think about.
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